Simple steps to a positive state!By Walid Khabbaze | Founder & Curator of mindX
Several principles in this article are based on Tony Robbins’ teachings from his Unleash the Power Within seminar. A mind-blowing 4-day event!
It is the MEANINGS and the resulting EMOTIONS that we attach to things and events in our lives which determine and control the quality of our lives. Let me elaborate…..
How was your day today?
On a scale of 1-10, with 1 being just awful and 10 being outstanding, how was your day today?
As you thought about the answer to this question, your conscious mind, boom! In a split of a second, accessed your unconscious mind in search for ‘data’ and experiences about your day, which had been stored as memories.
Now as you were having your experiences during the day, your mind associated a meaning to every single experience, which then turned into emotions. And it was these emotions which you recalled to help you decide whether you had a good day or a bad day.
Ladies and gentlemen, if life is but an accumulation of experiences, then life is but an accumulation of emotions. This is why self-help authors and life coaches like Tony Robbins say that:
‘Meaning equals emotion and emotion equals life’.
The important thing to stress here however is that the meanings we associate to the things in our lives, which ultimately become emotions are based on our own beliefs and values, on our own view of the world, on our own philosophy of life.
Do you know someone who complains all the time about everything? Even about things they can’t control? Such as the weather? Even letting a cloudy day ruin their mood?
We also all know someone who is always happy that we wonder what they are on. The different meanings and emotions that different people attach to experiences are virtually unlimited. This is what makes us unique.
When I was a young boy, my mother told me a story about a lady who survived a serious illness. She remained optimistic knowing that her treatment would be transient – she laughed, she smiled, she focused on a positive future, she told herself happy things all the time – her state of mind was a powerful force. I did not know what to make of this knowledge at such an early age, but it served as a metaphor – to always look at the brighter side of every scenario in life!
Would you like to know what the 3 forces that make up emotion are?
1.Physiology – the way we use our body – our posture – our breath – our movement. Emotion is created by motion. Instead of slouching your shoulders, stand up straight and hold your head up high, as if you have just received a standing ovation. Change your shallow breathing by doing 3-4 short deep breathing exercises per day. And see how you’ll feel after a few days.
You have the power to change your emotional state in a heartbeat!
2.Focus – whatever you focus on you feel because where focus goes energy flows. If I tell you – don’t think of your left hand, don’t think of your left hand, don’t think of your left hand, don’t think of your left hand. Now, what are you thinking of?
Because of something called the Reticular Activating System, our minds look for the things which we are focused on. This is why if you are thinking of buying a car, for example, all of a sudden you start seeing that same car everywhere!
- Do you focus on what you have in your life or on what is missing?
- Do you focus on the things you want and your goals & dreams or on the things holding you back?
Trade your expectations for appreciation because gratitude can destroy fear, which is what stops us from moving forward!
3.Language – especially the language we use with ourselves. We all have an internal dialogue and you might be surprised to hear but most achievers are members of “the self-beaters club”. We are so hard on ourselves – it is as if we are being paid for it. Even when we are successful at something, instead of celebrating our success, we think about how we could have done better, or jump instantaneously on to the next project. We are self-critical but we compliment others.
Think about this question for a moment: if a friend spoke to you in the same way you speak to yourself, would you still be their friend?
Turn your disempowering self-talk into empowering self-talk by being kind to yourself. Pat yourself on the back (literally) for your achievements – and even give yourself a personal high five from time to time.
Ladies and Gentlemen,
- We discussed meaning and emotion and how they determine and control the quality of our lives.
- We also spoke about the 3 forces that make up emotion and how we can use these to get ourselves into peak emotional states.
It is possible to take conscious control over the stories you tell yourselves, to improve the emotions you experience and to live an extraordinary life.